cycle of Socialization essay.
THE MAN BOX
Socialization is how we are raised and the values that we personally hold, whether we like it or not . Men have grown up following strict norms and rules that destroy personality and disable you from displaying of emotion. these are examples of the man box; A display that show the way men growing up are supposed to act, such as stereotypes and the correct way to treat others with or without differences, It basically forms you into today's definition of a man. It not only affects us but other sexualities and women too, this is due to one of the aspects of today’s “man box”. In Tony Porter's TedWomen Talk he explains the man box “ men had to be tough, had to be strong, had to be courageous, dominating -- no pain, no emotions, with the exception of anger -- and definitely no fear; that men are in charge, which means women are not; that men lead, and you should just follow and do what we say; that men are superior; women are inferior; that men are strong; women are weak; that women are of less value, property of men, and objects,particularly sexual objects. I've later come to know that to be the collective socialization of men, better known as the ‘man box.’” Socialization negatively affects everyone by teaching racially and sexually viewed stereotypes, by the negative views set through the man box, and how we are socialized to judge others differences.
I have been socialized to hide my emotions and be “a man about it” for these are ways the man box brainwashes us to be emotionless and cruel to others differences to fit into norms set by society. In Tony Porter's TedWomen talk he says “Kendall on the other hand- like I said only 15 months older than her-- he'd come to me crying, it’s like as soon as i would hear him a clock would go off. i’d give the boy about 30 seconds which by the time he got to me i'd be saying things like ‘Why are you crying’ ‘hold your head up’ ‘look at me’.” This is crucial for the boy to fit into today's norms, if he did cry or show emotion openly he'd be bullied, be picked on a be treated like people of the target group. Growing up I had also been told to not openly show my own emotion, and I know how this boy feels, he feels restricted from himself, it's almost like you have a angel on one shoulder telling you to be yourself, and the demon on your other shoulder telling you what would happen if you openly displayed your emotion, i've felt this way almost every minute of my life. Though this way of socialization is unkind and unforgiving it makes the person growing up fit into today's norms, but also deeply affects one's personality making people feel empty or hopeless, feeling what should I do next? People just end up giving up, not making waves. That's why the cycle of this socialization goes on.
As I have grown up I've been taught discretely to see women as objects not people all over the media and everywhere I look. Once again in Tony Porter's ted talk he explains “See collectively, we as men are taught to have less value in women, to view them as property and the objects of men. We see that as an equation that equals violence against women.” The way we are socialized affects woman in an extremely negative way making women seen as an object not a person, This affects the way women must have to fit into their gender identity\ roles. No thanks to the media everywhere we look we see examples of the way women are treated by men, all over T.V, websites and almost everywhere including ads everyone sees, making places an almost hostile environment for children growing up. This way that men have been socialized has made that some people wouldn't think twice about being cruel to others differences or women and has shaped my identity into one of almost despise of women, not anymore though, as I've realized how horrible this process really is. As men we have to fit into the set of norms the man box puts in front of us, and these norms will always affect others unless changes are made to this means of socialization.
As we grow up we are commonly told to man up, don't be a girl which can be one of the worst things to say, it not only isn't just an insult it destroys the boy to hear that, say if I said I wouldn't do something i'd be called a girl and the man box socialized me to be full of courage and no fear.. In an ideal world we wouldn't have to adhere to the man box as a nine year old says in the man box talk “I remember asking a nine-year-old boy, I asked a nine-year-old boy, "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said to me, "I would be free." We would be free if we didn't have to adhere to the man box, but this idea of a man box is used all the time by fathers socializing their children growing up it would be hard to make a change.This coming from a 9 year old reminds me of growing up, I felt cold inside, restricted from my real self but knowing that if I tore away from this I wouldn't fit in and have a miserable time in school, and be looked at strangely by others. This nine year old was brave enough to say that to Tony Porter then why aren't we brave enough to express ourselves, we aren't brave enough because the core of this socialization process is: fear, ignorance, insecurity, and confusion. This makes us too afraid to do anything, and the few that do pull away and attempt to make a change are shut down by the one's are too fearful, the way this cycle socializes is a near perfect way to affect us permanently.
Why don't we change? Why are we so afraid? We are afraid for we will be targeted or become part of the target group, our friends, our families will look at us different. The man box is our problem, but it is so deeply woven into the world that every aspect of the media, every book, even kids cartoons, If changes are to be made then we need to do it now before it is permanently in place because do we really want to be another father that socializes our sons and daughters in this cruel way, as the Cycle of Socialization by Bobby Haro states “ Often, when people study the phenomenon of oppression, they start with recognizing that human beings are different in many ways based upon gender, ethnicity, skin color, first language, age, ability status, religion, sexual orientation, and economic class. The obvious first leap that people make is the assumption that if we just began to appreciate differences and treat each other with respect, then everything would be alright.” If only that was the case but socialization has affected and hurt everyone's personalities that nobody will decide to make a change. Socialization has affected everyone in such a deep way that I don't know if we'll ever be able to set ourselves free from this process.
Socialization is how we are raised and the values that we personally hold, whether we like it or not . Men have grown up following strict norms and rules that destroy personality and disable you from displaying of emotion. these are examples of the man box; A display that show the way men growing up are supposed to act, such as stereotypes and the correct way to treat others with or without differences, It basically forms you into today's definition of a man. It not only affects us but other sexualities and women too, this is due to one of the aspects of today’s “man box”. In Tony Porter's TedWomen Talk he explains the man box “ men had to be tough, had to be strong, had to be courageous, dominating -- no pain, no emotions, with the exception of anger -- and definitely no fear; that men are in charge, which means women are not; that men lead, and you should just follow and do what we say; that men are superior; women are inferior; that men are strong; women are weak; that women are of less value, property of men, and objects,particularly sexual objects. I've later come to know that to be the collective socialization of men, better known as the ‘man box.’” Socialization negatively affects everyone by teaching racially and sexually viewed stereotypes, by the negative views set through the man box, and how we are socialized to judge others differences.
I have been socialized to hide my emotions and be “a man about it” for these are ways the man box brainwashes us to be emotionless and cruel to others differences to fit into norms set by society. In Tony Porter's TedWomen talk he says “Kendall on the other hand- like I said only 15 months older than her-- he'd come to me crying, it’s like as soon as i would hear him a clock would go off. i’d give the boy about 30 seconds which by the time he got to me i'd be saying things like ‘Why are you crying’ ‘hold your head up’ ‘look at me’.” This is crucial for the boy to fit into today's norms, if he did cry or show emotion openly he'd be bullied, be picked on a be treated like people of the target group. Growing up I had also been told to not openly show my own emotion, and I know how this boy feels, he feels restricted from himself, it's almost like you have a angel on one shoulder telling you to be yourself, and the demon on your other shoulder telling you what would happen if you openly displayed your emotion, i've felt this way almost every minute of my life. Though this way of socialization is unkind and unforgiving it makes the person growing up fit into today's norms, but also deeply affects one's personality making people feel empty or hopeless, feeling what should I do next? People just end up giving up, not making waves. That's why the cycle of this socialization goes on.
As I have grown up I've been taught discretely to see women as objects not people all over the media and everywhere I look. Once again in Tony Porter's ted talk he explains “See collectively, we as men are taught to have less value in women, to view them as property and the objects of men. We see that as an equation that equals violence against women.” The way we are socialized affects woman in an extremely negative way making women seen as an object not a person, This affects the way women must have to fit into their gender identity\ roles. No thanks to the media everywhere we look we see examples of the way women are treated by men, all over T.V, websites and almost everywhere including ads everyone sees, making places an almost hostile environment for children growing up. This way that men have been socialized has made that some people wouldn't think twice about being cruel to others differences or women and has shaped my identity into one of almost despise of women, not anymore though, as I've realized how horrible this process really is. As men we have to fit into the set of norms the man box puts in front of us, and these norms will always affect others unless changes are made to this means of socialization.
As we grow up we are commonly told to man up, don't be a girl which can be one of the worst things to say, it not only isn't just an insult it destroys the boy to hear that, say if I said I wouldn't do something i'd be called a girl and the man box socialized me to be full of courage and no fear.. In an ideal world we wouldn't have to adhere to the man box as a nine year old says in the man box talk “I remember asking a nine-year-old boy, I asked a nine-year-old boy, "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said to me, "I would be free." We would be free if we didn't have to adhere to the man box, but this idea of a man box is used all the time by fathers socializing their children growing up it would be hard to make a change.This coming from a 9 year old reminds me of growing up, I felt cold inside, restricted from my real self but knowing that if I tore away from this I wouldn't fit in and have a miserable time in school, and be looked at strangely by others. This nine year old was brave enough to say that to Tony Porter then why aren't we brave enough to express ourselves, we aren't brave enough because the core of this socialization process is: fear, ignorance, insecurity, and confusion. This makes us too afraid to do anything, and the few that do pull away and attempt to make a change are shut down by the one's are too fearful, the way this cycle socializes is a near perfect way to affect us permanently.
Why don't we change? Why are we so afraid? We are afraid for we will be targeted or become part of the target group, our friends, our families will look at us different. The man box is our problem, but it is so deeply woven into the world that every aspect of the media, every book, even kids cartoons, If changes are to be made then we need to do it now before it is permanently in place because do we really want to be another father that socializes our sons and daughters in this cruel way, as the Cycle of Socialization by Bobby Haro states “ Often, when people study the phenomenon of oppression, they start with recognizing that human beings are different in many ways based upon gender, ethnicity, skin color, first language, age, ability status, religion, sexual orientation, and economic class. The obvious first leap that people make is the assumption that if we just began to appreciate differences and treat each other with respect, then everything would be alright.” If only that was the case but socialization has affected and hurt everyone's personalities that nobody will decide to make a change. Socialization has affected everyone in such a deep way that I don't know if we'll ever be able to set ourselves free from this process.
Mask paragraph
Mask Paragraph
Everyday everyone hides behind a mask, Hides something about themselves to shield from today's norms of society. Making a mask frees me, enables me to express my true self, to truly express my true emotion and feelings. I have focused my mask most on how society breaks apart my true identity into different actions and feelings that did not express myself correctly. I painted multiple different shapes/patterns on the mask and added a few horns to once again represent how broken society has torn apart my identity. I then took shards of window and/or plastic to once again represent my broken identity, I realized that the media has also affected me and continues to affect me. These messages that are given through the media and my parents break apart my identity and take me over, that's what the barred figure on the mouth and the colored strips that reach up the sides represent. The way socialization has affected me and the way it makes me into an emotionless and aggressive person to fit into my gender role as a man. And because of this I've noticed how everything, everyway I've been socialized has effected me way more than I thought.
Everyday everyone hides behind a mask, Hides something about themselves to shield from today's norms of society. Making a mask frees me, enables me to express my true self, to truly express my true emotion and feelings. I have focused my mask most on how society breaks apart my true identity into different actions and feelings that did not express myself correctly. I painted multiple different shapes/patterns on the mask and added a few horns to once again represent how broken society has torn apart my identity. I then took shards of window and/or plastic to once again represent my broken identity, I realized that the media has also affected me and continues to affect me. These messages that are given through the media and my parents break apart my identity and take me over, that's what the barred figure on the mouth and the colored strips that reach up the sides represent. The way socialization has affected me and the way it makes me into an emotionless and aggressive person to fit into my gender role as a man. And because of this I've noticed how everything, everyway I've been socialized has effected me way more than I thought.
Project reflection
The Cycle of Socialization Project is how we explored the norms of society and the ways it effects us and others in many different ways. In this project we looked at the categories labeled Agent and Target groups, basically summing up the way you will be viewed in todays society. In this project we also built masks made of plaster that represented the way we were affected and viewed by todays society, these masked are shaped over our own faces and we had the freedom to put anything on these masks that represented how we are affected.
During this project I have reflected a lot on how socialization affects me and my peers. My mask is a way I have reflected on this. My mask reflects on many aspects on how I have been affected by socialization, thats why my favorite part of my mask is the horns, it shows how me and many others have been dehumanized by socialization, including the way I cant show my real emotion, my real thoughts and feelings, turning me and many others into a wreck of different emotions of sadness, and lack of direction, thats my most proudest part of my mask.
This project has been a major impact on the way I've looked at society and people in general. This part of my essay really spoke to me about how socialization affects others. "As I have grown up I've been taught discretely to see women as objects not people all over the media and everywhere I look. Once again in Tony Porter's ted talk he explains “See collectively, we as men are taught to have less value in women, to view them as property and the objects of men. We see that as an equation that equals violence against women.” The way we are socialized affects woman in an extremely negative way making women seen as an object not a person, This affects the way women must have to fit into their gender identity\ roles. No thanks to the media everywhere we look we see examples of the way women are treated by men, all over T.V, websites and almost everywhere including ads everyone sees, making places an almost hostile environment for children growing up. This way that men have been socialized has made that some people wouldn't think twice about being cruel to others differences or women and has shaped my identity into one of almost despise of women, not anymore though, as I've realized how horrible this process really is. As men we have to fit into the set of norms the man box puts in front of us, and these norms will always affect others unless changes are made to this means of socialization." - This part was my favorite (not for the writing quality) part because of how Ive realized how badly the way men is socialized has also really effected women and others of the target group. As I say in my topic sentence Men do affect women in general, the way they view themselves and the way they have to fit into their gender roles and identities, it really made me realize how deeply woven socialization is dug into todays society and its set of norms.
Ive taken away so much from this project, but the thing that stood out to me most is how the way i'm socialized affects others just as much as me. I will remember this most because every time I say something make a motion of my hands it could be affecting somebody even if my means of socialization makes me unable to realize it. An example which were if I were talking about somebody behind their back (which I would never do) It could affect them if they found out, they could go home crying, me or whoever would do that wouldn't even know what we caused. This is especially present due to the way men are socialized to view women as only skinny and blonde. Thats what I viewed as a major and an important part to me on what I have learned.
I have grown a lot in a lot of specific areas of the habits of heart and mind and I believe I have learned a lot in the areas of Refinement and Evidence. I feel I have grown a lot in the areas of refinement because Ive made multiple (around 4) layers of paint on my mask, and the multiple drafts that went into the essay, there were four rough drafts and one final draft plus multiple printout copies of these drafts for peer review and editing. I also improved a lot in evidence, Ive taken countless quotes from the Man Box Ted Talk, and a Quote from the Cycle of Socialization by Bobby Haro. Heres one of the quotes I've used “I remember asking a nine-year-old boy, I asked a nine-year-old boy, "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said to me, "I would be free." I also feel I've Learned how to put in quotes well too, and label who they are from without taking to much space on my essay. Thats what I feel I've improved in, and I've put a lot of refinement and work into this essay.
This project has been a major impact on the way I've looked at society and people in general. This part of my essay really spoke to me about how socialization affects others. "As I have grown up I've been taught discretely to see women as objects not people all over the media and everywhere I look. Once again in Tony Porter's ted talk he explains “See collectively, we as men are taught to have less value in women, to view them as property and the objects of men. We see that as an equation that equals violence against women.” The way we are socialized affects woman in an extremely negative way making women seen as an object not a person, This affects the way women must have to fit into their gender identity\ roles. No thanks to the media everywhere we look we see examples of the way women are treated by men, all over T.V, websites and almost everywhere including ads everyone sees, making places an almost hostile environment for children growing up. This way that men have been socialized has made that some people wouldn't think twice about being cruel to others differences or women and has shaped my identity into one of almost despise of women, not anymore though, as I've realized how horrible this process really is. As men we have to fit into the set of norms the man box puts in front of us, and these norms will always affect others unless changes are made to this means of socialization." - This part was my favorite (not for the writing quality) part because of how Ive realized how badly the way men is socialized has also really effected women and others of the target group. As I say in my topic sentence Men do affect women in general, the way they view themselves and the way they have to fit into their gender roles and identities, it really made me realize how deeply woven socialization is dug into todays society and its set of norms.
Ive taken away so much from this project, but the thing that stood out to me most is how the way i'm socialized affects others just as much as me. I will remember this most because every time I say something make a motion of my hands it could be affecting somebody even if my means of socialization makes me unable to realize it. An example which were if I were talking about somebody behind their back (which I would never do) It could affect them if they found out, they could go home crying, me or whoever would do that wouldn't even know what we caused. This is especially present due to the way men are socialized to view women as only skinny and blonde. Thats what I viewed as a major and an important part to me on what I have learned.
I have grown a lot in a lot of specific areas of the habits of heart and mind and I believe I have learned a lot in the areas of Refinement and Evidence. I feel I have grown a lot in the areas of refinement because Ive made multiple (around 4) layers of paint on my mask, and the multiple drafts that went into the essay, there were four rough drafts and one final draft plus multiple printout copies of these drafts for peer review and editing. I also improved a lot in evidence, Ive taken countless quotes from the Man Box Ted Talk, and a Quote from the Cycle of Socialization by Bobby Haro. Heres one of the quotes I've used “I remember asking a nine-year-old boy, I asked a nine-year-old boy, "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said to me, "I would be free." I also feel I've Learned how to put in quotes well too, and label who they are from without taking to much space on my essay. Thats what I feel I've improved in, and I've put a lot of refinement and work into this essay.
Socratic Seminar.
Seminar Reflection
There have been a lot of great, and not great comments made but one really stuck out for me. One comment that stuck out to me was Lydia's. The comment I made that started up the how danny and uno socialize each other, is when lydia made a great point on how Uno opened danny up and made him a better baseball player and a better person socially.
I've made many connections during that seminar but one stands out to me the most. I made a connection between how minorities are in poverty just like Danny and Uno and a connected this to today's world were frequently minorities pass over the border to get better opportunities in the U.S.A so they didn't have to scrape food off the ground to feed their family fed everyday, so they could get a few things they've always wanted, like a phone or a T.V. It's really sad this is the case.
I feel I did well in the seminar, I've made good new directions for the discussion, places my facts and opinions and everything. I feel I have done well in the evidence/making connections part of the seminar, due to the fact that I made a few good points and brought it back to the text frequently and made a couple of connections to other texts, etc. I don't have really anything I need to improve in (partially because I dont have the rubric) and I feel I did decent.
There have been a lot of inspiring quotes in Mexican Whiteboy. I feel there have been a lot of inspiring quotes but I really like a quote from senior “And here i am with my first born. just gave the boy a ten spot, so he could get himself some lunch tomorrow” Senior explaining poverty and explains how people think money revolves around everything, but really it's just green paper, and it's sad that's how senior and uno have to live, scrounging up any money they can, getting five hundred so uno can go to school at oxford. It really made me feel for all the characters in poverty in this book
There have been a lot of great, and not great comments made but one really stuck out for me. One comment that stuck out to me was Lydia's. The comment I made that started up the how danny and uno socialize each other, is when lydia made a great point on how Uno opened danny up and made him a better baseball player and a better person socially.
I've made many connections during that seminar but one stands out to me the most. I made a connection between how minorities are in poverty just like Danny and Uno and a connected this to today's world were frequently minorities pass over the border to get better opportunities in the U.S.A so they didn't have to scrape food off the ground to feed their family fed everyday, so they could get a few things they've always wanted, like a phone or a T.V. It's really sad this is the case.
I feel I did well in the seminar, I've made good new directions for the discussion, places my facts and opinions and everything. I feel I have done well in the evidence/making connections part of the seminar, due to the fact that I made a few good points and brought it back to the text frequently and made a couple of connections to other texts, etc. I don't have really anything I need to improve in (partially because I dont have the rubric) and I feel I did decent.
There have been a lot of inspiring quotes in Mexican Whiteboy. I feel there have been a lot of inspiring quotes but I really like a quote from senior “And here i am with my first born. just gave the boy a ten spot, so he could get himself some lunch tomorrow” Senior explaining poverty and explains how people think money revolves around everything, but really it's just green paper, and it's sad that's how senior and uno have to live, scrounging up any money they can, getting five hundred so uno can go to school at oxford. It really made me feel for all the characters in poverty in this book
Seminar Pre-write
Throughout the book Mexican Whiteboy many of the characters have to wear masks over their real identity. Danny and Uno have many masks they wear throughout the story but Danny and Uno have very prominent one's. Uno wears a mask to seem like the big tough guy but under that mask he's hiding insecurity of which race he his, White or black? Danny's mask is one of how he uses baseball and how he acts like he's not smart, because he dislikes being the only smart kid out of everyone else, he just wants to fit in, and just like Uno he's torn between if he's white or mexican.
The book Mexican Whiteboy by Matt de la Pena is a book about how a mexican boy from San Francisco is socialized and adjusted to fit into Mexico's social norms. Throughout this book there are countless examples of how Danny is socialized, like when uncle ray shows up to deal with Uno, Danny was socialized by others to deal with these issues himself. In The book Mexican Whiteboy senior explains poverty “Alright, lemme put it another way’ senor says holding an index finger in the air. he snaps. looks uno right in the eyes. “say you ain't round here. Say you jump the gun, turn off the freeway into national city. Thats only way you know you livin’ son. your boys from down the block, nah. But an outsider uno. Wouldn't need to hear no words either.” Senior explained how national city changes you makes you realize the poverty that's happening all around you. This is how this socializes you by seeing what's going on and hearing what's going on.
Throughout this story I have gained a lot of insight on how different it is in national city, how different they look at things, and the way they have been socialized. This book has impacted me and made me realize how privileged i am compared to the people in mexico, and I realized how different I have been socialized compared to them, and i feel bad about how different I am and the privileges I've gained through white privilege. I've realized that I should not take things for granted because in other places, they may not have that privilege.
The book Mexican Whiteboy by Matt de la Pena is a book about how a mexican boy from San Francisco is socialized and adjusted to fit into Mexico's social norms. Throughout this book there are countless examples of how Danny is socialized, like when uncle ray shows up to deal with Uno, Danny was socialized by others to deal with these issues himself. In The book Mexican Whiteboy senior explains poverty “Alright, lemme put it another way’ senor says holding an index finger in the air. he snaps. looks uno right in the eyes. “say you ain't round here. Say you jump the gun, turn off the freeway into national city. Thats only way you know you livin’ son. your boys from down the block, nah. But an outsider uno. Wouldn't need to hear no words either.” Senior explained how national city changes you makes you realize the poverty that's happening all around you. This is how this socializes you by seeing what's going on and hearing what's going on.
Throughout this story I have gained a lot of insight on how different it is in national city, how different they look at things, and the way they have been socialized. This book has impacted me and made me realize how privileged i am compared to the people in mexico, and I realized how different I have been socialized compared to them, and i feel bad about how different I am and the privileges I've gained through white privilege. I've realized that I should not take things for granted because in other places, they may not have that privilege.